Skip to main content

A Final recap!

I smile when I look at you... everything seems beautiful. You, my life, my children. Even though I am old, even though I do not understand like you do; I am happy where I am. I lost my husband a few months ago, you think I don’t understand; only I ignored. There are many stories that I want to tell you but I just can’t find the words to tell them all.

You give me a pity look every time I cross you. I have nothing to do the entire day but to look at the sky and wish "take me away". When I tell you, I do not want to live; there is nothing more I want than this, than being with you for the last days. I have lived my life for 86 wonderful years and now, u think I will be gone soon. I used to feel insecure; the thought of my life that will come to an end shook my very core. I couldn’t do anything about it though; no one can do anything about it. I started to talk, talk things in my head that you couldn’t understand.

When my heart bleeds, I ask for a few more days with you. I called for help! I knew I was dying. I knew deep inside there is nothing I can do about it. I stayed with you as long as I could. I lost my husband but losing you would mean the world. I still remain misunderstood on my feelings. I speak to you while you cook a meal, when you do your chores. I understand when you feel tired; I know I am the reason for all this. I am going through a lot of pain nothing more than what you are doing to keep me alive a few more days. I keep my head clear looking at the sky every single minute of the day to give me a peaceful death.

It was destiny; I believe that took me back. When fate decided that I have spent enough time with you. Well, am happy now without any regrets. I have seen you smile with me and now I have to see you cry, that is the difference.

Now, that I can still see you while I am gone. I know all of you loved me as much as I did. There is nothing more I wish to see than to feel happy at you missing me while I am gone. I am sad that I am not next to you while you cry... while you wish i could wake up any minute from a sleep too long to end. I am sorry my dear, I have met my ends. This however, does not mean that I am going away from you. With all my love, I will remain with you, in your thoughts, in your children, in your smile. Remember, I will always smile back you, love.

Love you my child,
Your mother!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Hold me

Sometimes, I wonder why my life is so blue,  when I am alone, I think of nothing more than you. When I look at the dark, a clear sky  I try to pave the way through the grey. When did I stop seeing you? Even when I day dream,  The more I stand alone,  the more I see of you. I struggle to get my thoughts to words,  I am messed up, that all I can say. I forgot that you exited in my life,  I don’t remember when it all started.  Is it on the day I stopped expecting? the night when I stop crying anymore? The mornings when I spared no time? I know you are long gone.  I am trying to get to you though I try at every second of my life now. I don’t know if I should look for reasons, all the reasons that I lost you.  I will keep trying until the day I exist the reason why you left me,  The day I start believing that I lost belief,  in many things called "life"
4 comments
More >>

Lost treasure..

C'mon wake up! Its time to get up! forget all your dreams; Wake up to where you are; before you realize, it is all a big mistake! Don't expect anything in reality to be what you dreamt of, coz you ain't the chess master here. You can always have what you want but only if you should rather,must! Nothing is planned, don't come to that conclusion. It's a big show and you ain't gonna be some grumpy audience. You should wake up to live what is in for you! Its called Life ! Live it !  P.S. This was a poem i wrote @ my previous office, retrieved :) Thanks to Somani! :D
2 comments
More >>

To ma, with love!

I did not think that I could write, About some feelings I cannot express. Many many days, I tried to tell you, All my love, that was right there. I pen down today, with tears, I realize it’s too late. You could have been here, To see your children grow; To see your wife's pride, To see how pampered mom is now. When you were right next to us, We feared to even speak. Today we yearn "If only he was here"! We console ourselves all the time, There is no point regretting. That you should rest in peace, And make heaven "Heavener". After ten years, we still hear you, In our thoughts; in our laughs. Every time mom says, "You are just like him". You live in us every day, With a brave heart, we will miss you always.
2 comments
More >>