Twenty 4 - Hours!

I loved you like I should, I loved you like I would. When I see only tears in my eyes The reason nothing more than just "you" Would I love you the way I should? Should I love you the way I would? You are my better half, not my bitter Together we are supposed to be happy You still think of me as a stranger in your life I am feeling "done" of the things you think are "undone". When you are not the one I love anymore, When you have become the reason for the pain, Would I love you the way I should? Should I love you the way I would?

There is something about your smile When your eyes tinkle with curiosity There is something about your hands When you move them through the air There is something about your thoughts When i try very hard to read them There is something about your color When they brush on my hands There is something about your strength When you make so many friends There is something about your smell When i try to catch my breath There is always something about you When i am tired from a long day There is something about your roots When i am trying to stand in mine There is something about you!

I have been married 12 years and my life looks like a dark patch of cloud. I am happy, my husband keeps me well but I have this constant feeling that I do not belong either with my mum or my husband. I feel void. Twelve years ago, the mornings were blissful. I waited to start my day with my new family. I finally had what i wanted all these years. A husband and my life finally (i thought) had begun. Yes, we were happy. I was at home, a home maker and my husband worked with one of the Top IT Companies. We have had good days and we have had those I wouldn’t want to talk about. Life gives you two sides of anything, right? So as days went buy, i was doing nothing but cooking and talking to people who come home and my husband but nothing more. I was asked not to go out. I was asked not to talk to strangers. Ours was a love marriage. I loved this man who once loved me for my "outgoing" personality. Now, I am in between the four walls, with whom i try to talk. I didn’t ...

This is what we dream. We all live our lives. We talk about allowing our children live their life. We say “live and let live” is our motto. Coming to reality, the laws are a little bit twisted…we listen to others gossip…We are curious to know what’s happening in our neighbor’s house. We want to know what someone else feels about the way we talk or dress… Well, can you stop yourself? We all are under the pressure... the constant pressure to impress... to not let yourself be misjudged. Why? It takes a little bit longer to realize there is nothing interesting in the neighbor’s doors anymore… takes a little longer to understand someone else could be doing the same about you... When would you really stop? When you realize you are already in the swamp? When you think there is nothing more left than ‘inner peace’? It’s the undeniable truth that we live our lives for others, not your mother but for the neighbor’s... for the people among whom you do not belong... W...

To many happy memories that I have made during the past years. Some memories, I have tried to forget to get along with the more interesting part of my life (I think :P). To the people who have brought happyness to me and to those who tried.  I believe in spreading true happyness, it is the only humanness that man cannot buy but hence, it’s worth is above the world. For money, I make and give, it is just a vicious circle of my life. I constantly push myself to write some good memories into my journal all the time but end up in tears of sorrow.  I shall constantly work on my skill to try and keep up with happiness and let go of my agonizing brains of emotions :) I am thrilled to know what the years are to bring. Like always, I try to stay modest and casual about it :P Let the show begin for the greatest and the weakest story in my head about you, me and them  which will be digital-lized  in many verses and paragraphs. Today, I res...

I have thought through my heart for the love I have always had for you. I have always loved you. I will not deny that we both have remained committed through the years that have gone behind us. Now, I stop to see where I am, I see you far away in the ocean so deep. I cannot see your face anymore; I cannot feel the love we shared no more. I try to come forward, take a leap; the sea seems to grow deeper.  I tried to cry to you, shout out to you that I cannot see you anymore. You tried to shoo me away with your anger that makes the ocean dark as black. I lose sight of you, my life. I have gained a lot and my wait now will mean nothing but suicide in the dark. I wish to live though; I wish to see my life a little happier and better, and not to cry for you.  When I told you I cannot feel you anymore, I didn’t need the materials to show that you were there. I wanted you. I cannot feel you anymore, my love. I have waited all the time for you to understand that...

Sometimes, I wonder why my life is so blue,  when I am alone, I think of nothing more than you. When I look at the dark, a clear sky  I try to pave the way through the grey. When did I stop seeing you? Even when I day dream,  The more I stand alone,  the more I see of you. I struggle to get my thoughts to words,  I am messed up, that all I can say. I forgot that you exited in my life,  I don’t remember when it all started.  Is it on the day I stopped expecting? the night when I stop crying anymore? The mornings when I spared no time? I know you are long gone.  I am trying to get to you though I try at every second of my life now. I don’t know if I should look for reasons, all the reasons that I lost you.  I will keep trying until the day I exist the reason why you left me,  The day I start believing that I lost belief,  in many things called "life"