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I believe in you

I always thought "your life is your consequence" which means your decision (right or wrong) is what you live (your life). While I am trying to clear my head over matters that I never planned or wasn't ready to face, I believe in you. When the child crossing the road hit by a truck is still alive, I would have debated that he was probably not hit in the vital organs, blah, and blah, blah. Now, I say it’s his "destiny", he is not meant to die. The purpose of his life is not fulfilled. My friends tried to convince me that life happens because it’s destiny. I argued its always ones' decision that makes life. If I argue now, I would say (now) partly for destiny and decisions. The example, when you pass in exams - you determine to pass or fail. You know that life will not be any better if the high scores reflected on the mark sheets. That's a decision, isn't it? Another one, when a family went to Indore (a place in India) for a picnic by the river, onl...

I still love you....(Continued)

I close my eyes to sleep thinking about him all the time. I smile and think again "Am I wrong"? I have never felt anything like this before. Suddenly, I feel the words he said "I love you" and I had goose-bumps instantly. I make up my mind, this is it. I have waited for a long time to find someone who loved me for who I am and I found him. What I also found is his family and children, is it possible to wash away the thought of his family? I keep thinking with my eyes closed. Imagining how it would feel if we were together now, I would probably break down crying my love to him, holding me close to his heart. I could imagine all of this like it was real. Is it wrong to love someone when you are already committed? With the smile still on my face, I snuggle up and sleep in the bed which I never found comforting but now, with all the love in his heart. Next day, I woke up and now there are no thoughts in my head. I am starting to feel a grip of my life now...

When i need you...

Time changes many aspects of life....  Your mind... Your goal...your thoughts... And ultimately the person you want to be and the people you want to be with.  My mind is the weakest on the day when I think "it will pass". I try to think that it will be over before I know it. Most of the times, it’s always one of the hardest days to pass. I think of ways that I could have changed but all I have in my mind is thinking "I don’t want this to repeat, not in mine, not others". Even when I have lost someone, a friend because of my dumb reactions, I wait. I wait until things will come back to normal.  The time I wait becomes the toughest, even climbing the "Himalayas" could be easier because I know I have to wait for forgiveness, I have to wait for circumstances to come back to what it once was and then it gets me thinking... "What if I can't be the same person after all?" "Will the wait change the person I am?" The truth I ...