Skip to main content

In your eyes

I always look at you, in the mirror and smile,
I look at you every day, thinking “life is good”
Thinking I have the perfect life and I should feel happie for what I have.
For the others, this may only be a dream.

One day, I stop – I am not smiling at you anymore.
Life seems to have paused I stare into your eyes,
Why isn’t life so good anymore, is it not good anymore?
I stare into the deepest thoughts and try to find – you.
Your smile fades with the slightest voice.

I start to think, what have I done – what am I even looking for,
You want to move on, think about starting anew.
Is it not too late – are you not old enough to remain happy with what you have?
Your eyes seems to water to the deepest oceans I have seen.

I stare at your eyes vaguely staying up with reality.
You say that you are not happy anymore – with me.
I blame myself saying what I missed seeing beyond that smile
I struggle to make it right for you but this battle was long lost.

I stare now at the mirror thinking when I woke up,
When did I think of all this as my own fault.
I know what would make you happy, to be free,
Your soul needs to know that you are happy!  

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Hold me

Sometimes, I wonder why my life is so blue,  when I am alone, I think of nothing more than you. When I look at the dark, a clear sky  I try to pave the way through the grey. When did I stop seeing you? Even when I day dream,  The more I stand alone,  the more I see of you. I struggle to get my thoughts to words,  I am messed up, that all I can say. I forgot that you exited in my life,  I don’t remember when it all started.  Is it on the day I stopped expecting? the night when I stop crying anymore? The mornings when I spared no time? I know you are long gone.  I am trying to get to you though I try at every second of my life now. I don’t know if I should look for reasons, all the reasons that I lost you.  I will keep trying until the day I exist the reason why you left me,  The day I start believing that I lost belief,  in many things called "life"

I believe in you

I always thought "your life is your consequence" which means your decision (right or wrong) is what you live (your life). While I am trying to clear my head over matters that I never planned or wasn't ready to face, I believe in you. When the child crossing the road hit by a truck is still alive, I would have debated that he was probably not hit in the vital organs, blah, and blah, blah. Now, I say it’s his "destiny", he is not meant to die. The purpose of his life is not fulfilled. My friends tried to convince me that life happens because it’s destiny. I argued its always ones' decision that makes life. If I argue now, I would say (now) partly for destiny and decisions. The example, when you pass in exams - you determine to pass or fail. You know that life will not be any better if the high scores reflected on the mark sheets. That's a decision, isn't it? Another one, when a family went to Indore (a place in India) for a picnic by the river, onl...

I still love you....

How I fell in love!? I still have a vague idea how this started, it was a wrong message I received. Like a child who found her chocolate, I was texting all day and all night. It was nice, the feeling. When he asked me, "How are you?", "How are you feeling?" after I caught cold. It was pleasant, I kept looking at my phone to see if he texted. Something was stopping me though; I was never the first to start a conversation. Though I am still not sure why, I moved that thought out of my mind to float in love, I am not sure if I had already fallen for him. Days went by, I saw his name blinking on my phone, and he was calling me. I panicked. I didn’t know if I could pick up the call. When I did after several seconds, I heard his voice for the first time saying "Hello", my heart sank. I was so dumbstruck that I didn’t respond for more than a minute, I was imagining a latest song tune. Finally, I responded, "hello". With the start, we spoke on the p...